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Honest Perversion

A very short story about a small adult woman searching for love and her male neighbour.

*

'Goddammit!'

I heard her shout and I thought "Another dating failure."

I was just enjoying a drink on my balcony when she came home in the late summer evening. Her balcony door was open so I could hear her kicking her shoes off, drop her bag and probably look for something to drink as I heard glasses moving.

She cursed some more although less audible, then I saw her come out.

'Hi Marr.' she said when she saw me.

The division between our balconies had cracked and broke off almost completely during an accident. It didn't bother us though so we left it as it was.

We had been neighbours and friends for about a year now, hanging around together is what we did whenever we felt like it.

She leaned on the railing. 'You heard?'

I held up the bottle of liquor.

'You offering?'

'Still need to ask?'

'I just don't want to impose.'

'Stop whining and get over here.'

She smiled and climbed over the lower part that was left of the division. I went inside to get another glass while she sat down on the small couch outside.

When I came back she had already confiscated my own glass.

'Hey!'

She stuck her tongue out at me. 'Finders keepers.'

'Fine.' I said, sat down and filled our glasses.

She drank half and pouted.

'Same again?' I asked, sipping my drink.

She nodded. 'I know I look like a little girl but why do all the guys showing interest have to be perverted pedos?' She gulped down the rest of her drink and held out her glass. 'I hate this body.'

I filled up her glass, then mine. 'Don't hate your body. It's in our nature.'

'What nature? Fuck anything female?'

I gave a nod. 'Something like that. Men want to spread their genes.'

She huffed and drank.

'Don't tell me you too.'

'Of course not.' I said with a devious smile. 'I just want to feel good with someone to love.'

'So you don't fall for little girls?'

I shrugged. 'Why not?'

She raised an eyebrow. 'You're telling me you're one of those perverts too?'

'I could be, if she's cute and wants me too.'

'Thank goodness I'm not cute then.' she said looking at nothing on the horizon.

I just drank until she looked at me with a frown.

'Aren't you supposed to say I AM cute?'

'I can. But then you're halfway my perverted preference and I don't want to worry you.'

She pouted. 'See? There's no decent guy out here.'

'What? I'm pretty decent.'

'Yeah sure.' she said and hit me with a pillow, making me spill my drink. 'Maybe you're the worst.'

I grinned, put away my glass and hit her back with another pillow, causing her drink to spill. 'You still came over here to me.'

She put her glass away and hit me again. 'That's because you got booze and I'm all out.'

'And it never occurred to you that I could take advantage of that?' I said and hit her.

'You just don't have the guts!' she said, hit me once more with a pillow and pounced me.

'Oh, I'll show you.' I said, wrestled her pillow away, then turned her around to hold her tight in my embrace and tickle to make her laugh.

She squirmed and wriggled until I stopped and let her calm down. She relaxed against me.

'You can't win against me.' she said, tracing my fingers with hers. 'You're either not interested or a frigging pedo when it comes to someone like me.'

I stroked my cheek gently against hers. 'I can disprove the first easily to you, just not the second.'

She pointed at her glass. I took it, handed it to her, filled it up again and she sipped it silently.

'Would you try the second?' she asked eventually.

'If I knew how to do it.'

'And the first?'

I held her a little tighter. 'Isn't this obvious enough?'

She started crying softly. 'Why?'

'Why not?' I said. 'I can't help but find you cute. I also want to draw your smooth curves.'

'But you always draw those busty models.'

'Those are for my customers. I want to draw you only for myself. I don't want to reveal you to other men. I'm just jealous that way.'

She chuckled, wiping her eyes. 'You're nuts.'

'That, I will never deny.'

She turned around on my lap and hugged me tight. 'You make it so hard to be suspicious of you.'

'I'm not suspicious, I admit being perverted freely.'

She looked into my eyes. 'The greatest trick the devil ever pulled, was hiding in plain sight.'

'You got me there.'

'I do.' she said and kissed me.

***

She woke up in my arms and snuggled closer. 'I lost all hope in ever getting to feel this way.'

'I'm happy I could give you this.'

'Thank you for making me feel truly wanted.' she said and combed the hair on my chest with her fingers. 'And for not taking advantage of me.'

'Who said I didn't? You're wearing my shirt and I've been relishing in holding you all night and even ran my fingers along your buns.'

She chuckled. 'Damned pervert.' she said and crawled on top of me. 'How should I punish you?'

'Like any woman does to a man, become my girlfriend.'

She smiled softly. 'You mean it?'

'I don't want this to end up like a one-time thing.' I said, stroking her back. 'I want to be with you.'

She kissed me and we spend what felt like an eternity in bed until we got hungry. I made breakfast while she showered and we ate it on the balcony in the morning sun.

She crawled over the division onto her balcony after we finished.

'Wait for me to come home?' she asked.

'I have nothing planned for today so I'll probably be home when you finish work.'

She beckoned me closer. I leaned over to her and she kissed me again.

'I'll be really happy to come home for the first time in a long while.' she said.

'I've always been happy to hear you come home.' I said, which earned me another kiss.

'You'd better not be really good at hiding you're a pervert.' she said and poked my chest.

'I thought I wasn't hiding it.' I said and ran my fingers through her hair.

She waved with her fingers before disappearing into her apartment and I went into mine with the biggest smile I ever sported on my face.A very short story about a small adult woman searching for love and her male neighbour.

*

'Goddammit!'

I heard her shout and I thought "Another dating failure."

I was just enjoying a drink on my balcony when she came home in the late summer evening. Her balcony door was open so I could hear her kicking her shoes off, drop her bag and probably look for something to drink as I heard glasses moving.

She cursed some more although less audible, then I saw her come out.

'Hi Marr.' she said when she saw me.

The division between our balconies had cracked and broke off almost completely during an accident. It didn't bother us though so we left it as it was.

We had been neighbours and friends for about a year now, hanging around together is what we did whenever we felt like it.

She leaned on the railing. 'You heard?'

I held up the bottle of liquor.

'You offering?'

'Still need to ask?'

'I just don't want to impose.'

'Stop whining and get over here.'

She smiled and climbed over the lower part that was left of the division. I went inside to get another glass while she sat down on the small couch outside.

When I came back she had already confiscated my own glass.

'Hey!'

She stuck her tongue out at me. 'Finders keepers.'

'Fine.' I said, sat down and filled our glasses.

She drank half and pouted.

'Same again?' I asked, sipping my drink.

She nodded. 'I know I look like a little girl but why do all the guys showing interest have to be perverted pedos?' She gulped down the rest of her drink and held out her glass. 'I hate this body.'

I filled up her glass, then mine. 'Don't hate your body. It's in our nature.'

'What nature? Fuck anything female?'

I gave a nod. 'Something like that. Men want to spread their genes.'

She huffed and drank.

'Don't tell me you too.'

'Of course not.' I said with a devious smile. 'I just want to feel good with someone to love.'

'So you don't fall for little girls?'

I shrugged. 'Why not?'

She raised an eyebrow. 'You're telling me you're one of those perverts too?'

'I could be, if she's cute and wants me too.'

'Thank goodness I'm not cute then.' she said looking at nothing on the horizon.

I just drank until she looked at me with a frown.

'Aren't you supposed to say I AM cute?'

'I can. But then you're halfway my perverted preference and I don't want to worry you.'

She pouted. 'See? There's no decent guy out here.'

'What? I'm pretty decent.'

'Yeah sure.' she said and hit me with a pillow, making me spill my drink. 'Maybe you're the worst.'

I grinned, put away my glass and hit her back with another pillow, causing her drink to spill. 'You still came over here to me.'

She put her glass away and hit me again. 'That's because you got booze and I'm all out.'

'And it never occurred to you that I could take advantage of that?' I said and hit her.

'You just don't have the guts!' she said, hit me once more with a pillow and pounced me.

'Oh, I'll show you.' I said, wrestled her pillow away, then turned her around to hold her tight in my embrace and tickle to make her laugh.

She squirmed and wriggled until I stopped and let her calm down. She relaxed against me.

'You can't win against me.' she said, tracing my fingers with hers. 'You're either not interested or a frigging pedo when it comes to someone like me.'

I stroked my cheek gently against hers. 'I can disprove the first easily to you, just not the second.'

She pointed at her glass. I took it, handed it to her, filled it up again and she sipped it silently.

'Would you try the second?' she asked eventually.

'If I knew how to do it.'

'And the first?'

I held her a little tighter. 'Isn't this obvious enough?'

She started crying softly. 'Why?'

'Why not?' I said. 'I can't help but find you cute. I also want to draw your smooth curves.'

'But you always draw those busty models.'

'Those are for my customers. I want to draw you only for myself. I don't want to reveal you to other men. I'm just jealous that way.'

She chuckled, wiping her eyes. 'You're nuts.'

'That, I will never deny.'

She turned around on my lap and hugged me tight. 'You make it so hard to be suspicious of you.'

'I'm not suspicious, I admit being perverted freely.'

She looked into my eyes. 'The greatest trick the devil ever pulled, was hiding in plain sight.'

'You got me there.'

'I do.' she said and kissed me.

***

She woke up in my arms and snuggled closer. 'I lost all hope in ever getting to feel this way.'

'I'm happy I could give you this.'

'Thank you for making me feel truly wanted.' she said and combed the hair on my chest with her fingers. 'And for not taking advantage of me.'

'Who said I didn't? You're wearing my shirt and I've been relishing in holding you all night and even ran my fingers along your buns.'

She chuckled. 'Damned pervert.' she said and crawled on top of me. 'How should I punish you?'

'Like any woman does to a man, become my girlfriend.'

She smiled softly. 'You mean it?'

'I don't want this to end up like a one-time thing.' I said, stroking her back. 'I want to be with you.'

She kissed me and we spend what felt like an eternity in bed until we got hungry. I made breakfast while she showered and we ate it on the balcony in the morning sun.

She crawled over the division onto her balcony after we finished.

'Wait for me to come home?' she asked.

'I have nothing planned for today so I'll probably be home when you finish work.'

She beckoned me closer. I leaned over to her and she kissed me again.

'I'll be really happy to come home for the first time in a long while.' she said.

'I've always been happy to hear you come home.' I said, which earned me another kiss.

'You'd better not be really good at hiding you're a pervert.' she said and poked my chest.

'I thought I wasn't hiding it.' I said and ran my fingers through her hair.

She waved with her fingers before disappearing into her apartment and I went into mine with the biggest smile I ever sported on my face.

perversion   honest  

Jun 9, 2018 in romance

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